Reeling in Laughs, Tangled Lines, and Kiwi Lingo
Fishing in New Zealand isn’t just about bagging a big snapper or pulling up a wriggling kahawai. It’s about the mates, the gear, the mission—and the comedy gold that inevitably comes with all three. Whether you're deep in the bush with your fly rod, chasing trout in the South Island, or standing shin-deep on a beach up north wondering if you packed your waders—there’s always something to laugh about.
This guide to funny fishing terms and mishaps is made for anyone who’s cast a line and copped a bird’s nest backlash, hooked their own vest, or lost their sunnies to a rogue wave. Welcome to the lighter, funnier side of fishing.
The Big Fish, Small Fish, and the Yeah-Nah Factor
Large Fish: Tales Bigger Than Your Catch
“Bro, it was this big!” [gestures to wingspan of an albatross] — Ah yes, the universal sign of the oversized fish story. Kiwi anglers are world-class when it comes to embellishing catch sizes. You’d swear we’re reeling in orcas if you believed every tale.
Any fish not photographed doesn’t count. If it’s not on Instagram with a smug grin and a tackle bag in frame, did it even happen?
Small Fish: The Shame You Can't Hide
Then there’s the other side—when you rock up with a rod designed to pull in marlin and catch something the size of a chicken nugget. Bonus points if it ends up on TikTok.
In NZ, it’s basically a rite of passage to catch something that flops off the hook faster than you can say “net it!”
Casting: Not as Easy as it Looks on YouTube
The Miscast Olympics
Casting might be a skill, but it’s also a gamble. One twitch too hard and your lure’s now in a flax bush. Or your sunnies. Or your mate’s mullet. And then there's always one person trying to cast like they’re in a fly tying ad, only to drop the hook right next to their gumboot.
If you haven’t yelled “CLEAR!” before casting, you’re fishing wrong.
Side Note: Birds Love Lures
If you’ve ever watched a seagull mistake your spinnerbait for lunch, you’ll know how quickly a relaxing morning can become an episode of Survivor: Tackle Edition.
Fishing Gear: Built for Fishing, Not Coordination
Tackle Boxes = Chaos in a Case
Organising a tackle box is like playing Tetris blindfolded with barbed wire. There’s no system. Just chaos. Hooks in the wrong compartments, soft baits leaking mystery goo, and that one rusty spoon you swear worked “back in the day.”
Opening your tackle box is a high-risk event. Don’t do it in wind. Or on a boat. Or sober.
Fly Tying: The Craftiest Comedy
Fly tying seems serene—until your materials end up glued to your beard. Nothing says “outdoorsman” like glitter dubbing stuck to your hoodie and a hackle feather poking out your fishing vest.
Rods & Reels: The Drama Duo
Every rod-reel combo has its personality. Some are reliable. Others are divas. If your reel’s ever screeched louder than your car brakes, or your rod tip’s snapped mid-flex, you’re in the club.
And don’t even start on spinning reels that go rogue. The only thing spinning faster than your reel is your patience.
Classic Funny Fishing Terms (NZ Approved)
Let’s decode the most unintentionally hilarious terms in fishing lingo:
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Backlash – When your reel explodes into a spaghetti nightmare.
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Skunked – Catching nothing. “Got skunked hard, aye.”
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Snagged – Happens on the first cast. Your soft bait is gone. You blame the spot.
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Chumming – Tossing bait in. Also what happens after pie + swell.
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Tight Lines – Fishing’s way of saying “don’t stuff it up.”
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Leader – Not the team captain—just the bit of line that snaps when you're winning.
Fashion Meets Function: What You Wear is Half the Joke
Waders: Gumboots’ Overachieving Cousin
You think you look like Bear Grylls. You actually look like someone about to audition for Shrek: The Fishing Musical. Bonus points if you trip walking backwards.
Fishing Vests: Pockets With Personality
Fishing vests are practical—until you forget which pocket holds your pliers and which one’s hiding a rogue treble hook. You will poke yourself. Guaranteed.
Sunglasses: Essential, Until You Drop Them
Polarised sunnies are a must… which makes it even worse when they go flying off mid-cast. Every Kiwi angler has a pair “sleeping with the fish.”
Lights, Nets, and Other Accidental Weapons
Nets: Handy or Hilarious?
Trying to net a fish while someone yells “LEFT! LEFT!” is pure chaos. Nets are a group activity in the same way three-legged races are: clumsy, loud, and rarely successful.
Beacons & Lights: Look Flash, Feel Flash
Headlamps are fishing’s version of nightclub strobe lights. If you’ve ever blinded your mate while rummaging through your tackle bag, congrats—you’re part of the glow squad.
Tales From the Tackle Bag
Every seasoned angler has That One Story™ involving a catastrophic gear moment:
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Rod tip flew off mid-cast into a sheep paddock.
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Lucky lure left on the roof of the ute.
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Slippery sunscreen fingers + $300 reel = goodbye.
These are the real trophies. Not the fish. The fails.
Kiwi Fishing Slang: You’re Not Local Until You Say...
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“Bit of a mission” – Took three wrong turns and forgot the bait.
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“Gave it a nudge” – You tried. Badly. With enthusiasm.
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“Mean as!” – Shouted when someone lands something worth a brag.
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“You beauty!” – Followed by tripping over the chilly bin.
The Joy of Fishing Jokes
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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
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Why did the fish blush? Because it saw the boat bottom.
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What did the snapper say to the bait? Bite me.
Final Thoughts: Cast, Laugh, Repeat
Fishing isn’t just about the perfect hook-up—it’s about the chaos, the comedy, and the catch that got away (but made the better story). Next time you pack your fishing tools, tackle bag, rods, reels, and slightly dodgy net, don’t forget to laugh at yourself too.
Because in New Zealand, the water’s never too cold for a yarn.
At HOOK LINE SINKER, we know that fishing is more than casting a line—it’s about the stories, the gear, and the good times. Whether you're searching for fishing TOOLS, TACKLE, RODS, REELS, NETS, LURES, HOOKS, FISHING LINES, FLY FISHING FLIES, HEADLAMPS, TACKLE BAGS, WADERS, FISHING VESTS, or SUNGLASSES, we’ve got the gear that keeps the laughs coming and the lines tight.
Keep yarning and happy fishing! 🎣